Warning this post is purely opinion piece!

Some background, I have a rough relationship with social media, I love it like I'm actually almost at every social media you can find (although mostly just checking out what people are using it for and left) but at the same time I do believe that me spending too much time on it cause me trouble in a form of contributing to mental health. Like a lot of artists, I don't have too much support or appreciation from my family (in my case, until I have proved myself that I can earn a living by doing so. Blah blah blah, insert being big sister in Asian family story here)

I'm not really one you can say that popular? I never really reach 1k following in any platform and at best most of my stuff is not getting that high like/share either, If i'm correct it's never really got pass 60?. Now if you're wondering 'Yeah why does it matter xylia?'. You're right to ask and here is why i'm telling you it.

I've always hated artist who complain about not getting many likes or get a lot of affection and appreciation of their work, while every piece of them have comment on it and people supporting them. You know artist with 10k followers+ complaining about how their work suck and no one pay attention to them when all of their post have 1k+ likes and share? Yeah! I hate them for 2 reasons.

One is simple, Why I can't get that myself too? I'm not a type to lie about my feeling, so yeah. Some of that hate is coming from me being jealous all of the attention they got and I feel entitled to have some of it for myself too. I don't think my art look bad at all, so why not me too? Yeah… xylia can be bit of an ass sometime!

Second is a bit complex. It's an odd feeling of angry?. Let's go with angry. I feel angry at that artist for two more reason. What the hell do you think those numbers mean? People appreciate your art! It's why they like it and share it. It might not be much, but some did right? I feel angry that these people are left 'unseen' and not being noticed! You got more support than me! (Keyword is you have more than me) And other reason? I'm confused and angry. I can see why their work is so great. I'm a person who's quick to notice a change. Mood, voice tone, Facial expression, Behavior and of course it includes progression too. Most of the time I can see a clear improvement of each art piece that people did. Even if it's just a little progression. I'm angry that I can see that they have talent and how much they put into their work but they don't see it.

I don't get how come they don't notice it. (And appreciate it because I'm being smug ass about my work a lot, I don't like it when people don't appreciate their work or look down on their work)

I've always struggled with the numbers and rating. 'On scale of 1 - 10 how would you rate…' I never understand those or know how to answer something when ask to be rate by numbers and I think it's pretty suck seeing movie and games being rate like that. The more I think about it the more I just think it's just a part of being human.

Good? But how good is it? It's very good? but like how good is very good? I think we did that to 'understand' more about how good is something or how bad is something and make it a number to better understand it. It's seeing stuff being rate at 5 is a more clear picture than just 'good enough' or 'not bad not good'. 1 or low numbers being bad. 10 or bigger number mean good. Not to mentioned that we like to categorized stuff too!

I think you might already know if you're an artist yourself or you're a friend of one, or regularly interact with art. Artist often seen as a useless job despite being important part of culture and society. Many also don't get art or think it's not worth to be a career and so on. I think many artist have a lot to prove themselves to the world one way or another until they get accepted. Might be the case with everything else too i'm not sure and I don't claim to know if that was the case.

Many artists I know struggle with self-confident a lot due to that. “My art is not good enough” is what I keep seeing despite all of them are a great artist and I like their work a lot. And I think other people who follow them like it too. Problem is art is already subjective. One liking your art and one does not doesn't really mean your art is good or bad. It's just mean this person like and this one just either dislike it or it's not their taste. (I guess you can kind of judge which art is good and bad if you have more concept to based on not just this person like this and this one not, Say judging art stuff based on the concept, the coloring, the line etc.)

With social media and art website is never been easier to publish art and show it to other people online. Seeing your art getting like can be a really rewarding feeling, you know. 'I made this and this many people like it too, holy shit!' it's feel seen and recognized. And it's definitely feel like your art is appreciated. And with social media share? Wow this person like it so much that they want to share it with other!

Yeah. Problem for me is…. it does put a numbers on art isn't? The numbers is shown, the score is put into a more clear picture. Lower number mean few people like it which that must not be a good thing, Bigger number mean people like it which mean it's must be good